Lies

Why do people feel compelled to tell lies? I wonder how we can convince ourselves that a little lie is OK to tell. I spend all day with people and I have studied the physical signs of a person lying. I am astounded when I am sure I am being told a story and it is just alright with them. Why?

A Buddhist writer commented, " If I tell a lie, I am afraid of something. If I tell lies I am living in fear." I often wonder what I am most afraid of and why I am afraid of it. What would I lose by being fully honest and living with the consequences? I know I am deeply conditioned in my life and I am a result of my conditioning and yet when if ever is it Ok to tell a lie? Could I just remain silent or say none of your business? I found in the Army that admitting an error and following the admission with the magic words such as " No excuse, sir or maam" saves more headaches and often garners respect.

What will my excuses be at the judgement bar with the one who knows my experiences and my pains? I know it will do no good to lie in that circumstance! Yet I wonder if my savior is saddened when I lie to myself and act in a way I know I shouldn't? I know that I should be more sensitive to the truth in my relationship with myself and others. I have a hard enough time fighting my most dreaded foe-myself! And I know I don't have full control to change another persons behavior.

So, next time I am told that the two year old in my office is an excellent tooth brusher, I plan to be kind and know that there is nothing to gain from lying to me about your child's health. You have money, time and regrets as lessons for not choosing better. As for me I will continue to balance what matters and control what I can and seek an honest path for me. Because I have something to lose- that is my self dignity. Joe